I didn't want to waste it!

5 min read

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MySocksRock's avatar
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I am not big on milestones here on dA.  Perhaps because I was here for seven years before I deleted my account and made this one and I had hundreds of deviations.  But my 100th on this account is approaching and since others seem to think the 100th deviation is cool, I didn't want to waste it on this thought I was dealing with today.  Besides... I can't finish it... and I can't focus on it anymore.  So.. here it is.. unfinished and I'm not really sure what the point of it is.  :)

~

Words are only words.  How many times should I repeat myself?

Lies continue to spill from your lips.  You say I know we belong together.  How nice that you have the ability to read my mind and know what I know when you don’t even know me. 

You are searching for something special, I understand.  I have told you time and time again however, it is not me.  I am not special, at least not to you.  I don’t want to be special to you. 

Lines disguised as love poems do not get a second thought.  I am not like the other girls you have wooed.  I know the difference between truth and manipulations.

Yes, I told you I felt safe with you.  What I meant was that from the moment we met I knew I would never be in danger of falling in love with you.  That is what made me feel safe.

I know how it feels to lose the love of your life, and I know I am not the love of your life.  I am sorry for your pain, I am sorry I caused it.  I am easy to get over.  Ask anyone who has gotten over me.  

~

I guess I just feel like this man is trying to bully me into being in a relationship with him.  We went on one date!  And I wasn't feeling it.  I can't help it that he really liked me.  I mean... what's not to like right?  LOL... DON'T ANYBODY ANSWER THAT!!!  ;)

I don't want to be mean, but I don't want to be totally heartless and just start ignoring him.  I keep telling him no and he will not accept that.  And honestly... nothing scares me more than a man who does not know the meaning of the word no.

On a more happy note... I have been inspired and hopefully will have a nice little piece of writing up soon.  That can be my 100th! :)

Hope y'all are doing well.

Peace
C

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Comments23
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nightshade-keyblade's avatar
Don't say that! Not to play the devil's advocate, but it does suck balls when you are really liking a girl and she is pushing you away.

At the same time, you aren't leading him on. You explained how you felt in a compassionate way (from what I understand) and that already is something that he can and should appreciate. Not all girls do that. Let you down gently while being honest, that is.